I'm ***, a student from miri, sarawak. a form 3 student and I'm going to face PMR.
I need your help in english. I always get B/C in english exam, but I hope to get A for english in PMR.
Here is my essay, can you help me to mark my english essay?
You have just spent your school holiday in Malacca. Use the short note below, write a letter to your friend overseas about your holiday in Malacca.
- Visited A Famosa
- Bought souvenirs
- saw many species of crocodiles
- watched crocodile-feeding sessions
- large shopping complex
- watched movie in cineplex
- enjoyed water games
sorry I don't remember the full sentences of the note. I had tried my best to write it out >_<
so here is my essay. :) the full marks is 35. please give me the marks of my essay ya. >_<
Hey! How are you recently? I had received your letter last week. You said you had joined a english essay competition which was organised by your school, and you won the champion! Congratulation! You did a great job! I'm sure that your parents should be proud of you. Besides, sorry for the late reply. Because I have just spent my school holiday in Malacca with my lovely family. So, let's talk about my trip in Malacca.
On the first day of my trip in Malacca, we went to the historical sites of Malacca, A Famosa. We bought some souvenirs there, we have also take photographs there. After visited A Famosa, we went to visit the crocodile farm. The way to go to crocodile farm was very bumpy and need 2 hours to reach there. But we chat happily with each others so we don't feel tired on the way to crocodile farm. I saw many species of crocodiles there, it's really interesting! It helped me to exhanced my knowledge. We have also watched crocodile-feeding sessions. I wish that you can watched with me because it's really horrible that many crocodiles get their food together!
On the next day, we went to Mahkota Parade, which is a large shopping complex and very famous in Malacca. There sell so many things that worth to buy it. The price is so cheap the the things is beautiful with creative. We have also watch movie in the cineplex which is situated in the Mahkota Parade. It had a very large movie screen and it's really comfortable to watch a movie there. After that, we have rest for a while in our hotel and went to the A Famosa Water World which is near by our hotel. We enjoyed water games and had a picnic there. It's so fun!
We went back to miri on the next day. I had a really sweet memories during the trip. I'm so regret about didn't take photographs when visited the crocodile farm. I've forgot about it. So, that's all about my school holiday. How about you? How do you spent your school holiday? I'm really interested to know about it. Anyways, wish you all the best and have a healthy body. Don't forget to bring my wish to your parents too. Wait for your reply. God bless.
Sorry for the late reply. Nice to meet someone from across the China Sea virtually.. Thanks for the comment about my blog :)
I've already checked your essay. Good effort ***!
DIRECTED: INFORMAL LETTER
Your friend in Singapore has written to you to inform you that his cousin in Penang was down with dengue fever. He would like to know the situation in Malaysia as he plans to bring his family over for the holidays in June. Write a letter to brief him about the current situation.
In your letter, include the following:
- express concern over the health of your friend’s cousin
- news about the situation
- steps taken authorities
- present situation
- use the informal letter format
- use all the points given
- expand each of the points given
- write in paragraph
Taman Bukit Bintang,
14 January 2011
How are you? I’m sorry to hear that your cousin had dengue fever. This problem seems to have become very serious all of sudden. We always feel that the problem is not our concern until someone close to us is affected.
My neighbour’s daughter who was in Standard 6 last year could not sit for UPSR examination because she was down with dengue fever on the eve of the exam. Fortunately, the authorities gave her an exemption so she is now in Form One. There were also a few students taking the examination in the hospital.
According to the news, students made up nearly 30 per cent of the 1 500 suspected cases over the first three weeks of the year. About 53 per cent of 621 confirmed cases last year comprised children and youth under the age of 24. These statistics are quite worrying. This has prompted the health ministry to increase checks on aedes breeding grounds in school and public areas. The construction sites are largely to blamed. The problem is made worse by the rainy season. The stagnating water attract the mosquitoes to lay egg and breeding on the areas.
The authorities have taken various steps to control the situation. Fogging has been carried out in many public areas and most of the housing estates. Contractors at the construction sites have been instructed to take appropriate actions and warned to clean up. They could be fined up to RM 3 000 for breeding aedes mosquitoes. Lot of campaigns through the television, radio and newspapers were taken to make people aware of the issue and take precaution rather than cure them.
Before the long holidays for the Chinese New Year, schools all over Malaysia carried out a clean-up campaign of the school compound. The residents’ association in my housing are also organised a family day clean-up of the housing estate. There were huge piles of rubbish especially old tyres and containers littered by the hawkers near the might market site.
The situation in Malaysia has improved since the end of January. There have been no reports of new cases of dengue. So, don’t worry. You can bring your family for a holiday here in June. I’m looking forward to seeing them again.
Send my regard to your mom and dad. Do take care.
Source: SPM SAMPLE OF ESSAYS - DIRECTED WRITING @ English For All